Warburn Rumours 2014 Semillon Sauvignon Blanc

 

*The score for this wine is based on a comparison of similarly priced bottled wines*

 

I’ve read a few reviews for the Warburn Rumours 2014 Semillon Sauvignon Blanc and in every single one people have made a ‘rumours’ joke. Really? A rumours joke… If I were to review their review I’d give it a 0 for creativity. Obviously I don’t want to judge these people based on one review, but I will. They sound like dicks. People who would rather spit in a busker’s empty guitar case then throw a ten cent piece in. Maybe if they weren’t drinking so much wine all the time they would realise what monsters they had become.

 

I am obviously going to do a much better job at reviewing this wine, and helping me is a celebrity (celeb) guest reviewer.

 

Visuals

Grant:

In a lot of cheap wine the colour can be very pale, washed out and watery; this was the opposite. Just look at the picture. That’s a great looking wine if you ask me.

 

 

Edie:

Visually the wine was awe-inspiring (it inspired awe). It had a nice golden colour, somewhat akin to sunshine rather than the usual colour of urine.

The label is adorably hand done, rather than being done by some stupid graphic design student doing a shoddy job at trying to look professional.

 

 

Scent

Grant:

The aromas were citrusy and tart, but at the same time harsh like a racist grandparent.

 

 

Edie:

On the nose the wine smelt a lot like cheap white wine.

 

 

Taste

Grant:

After the smell, I was preparing for the worst, but surprisingly the taste wasn’t that strong, which made for some very easy drinking. The taste was fruity, mostly tasting of lemons. The only downfall was the finish. Like the cyclist who celebrated too early and crashed just before the line, the finish was horrible.

 

 

Edie:

The wine tasted like a mixture of truths and untruths. The truths being that it tasted nice, the untruths being that it didn’t taste nice and it was a bit of a dick. It was easy drinking; light, refreshing, citrusy and smooth. It doesn’t try to be or do anything exciting. I would definitely recommend it to an over 50’s married, maybe divorce, elderly woman. A Helen Mirren type.

 

 

Overall

Grant:

For the price; definitely worth it. But remember, if you need a bottle of wine you don’t always need to buy one. Use an old bottle and just fill that bad boy up from a 4 litre sack, no one will know.

 

 

Edie:

Great value for money; a nice table wine.

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